Yitro- Jethro

Another contribution from Rabbi Farber, thanks again, brother

"Welcome To My World Yaacov"


Parashat HaShavua Yitro / Jethro

This Week's Reading List:
Shemot / Exodus 18:1-20:23
Yeshayahu / Isaiah 6:1-7:6; 9:5-6
Mattityahu / Matthew 5:17-32
Ivrim / Hebrews 12:18-24


Shemot {18:1} Now Yitro, the priest of Midian, Moshe's ab-in-law (father-in-law), heard of all that G-D had done for Moshe, and for Yisrael His people, how that HaShem had brought Yisrael out of Mitzrayim (Egypt). {18:2} Yitro, Moshe's ab-in-law, received Zipporah, Moshe's wife, after he had sent her away, {18:3} and her two sons. The name of one son was Gershom, for Moshe said, "I have been a sojourner in a foreign land". {18:4} The name of the other was Eliezer, for he said, "My ab-'s G-D was my help and delivered me from Pharaoh's sword." {18:5} Yitro, Moshe's ab-in-law, came with his sons and his wife to Moshe into the wilderness where he was encamped, at the Mountain of G-D. {18:6} He said to Moshe, I, your ab-in-law Yitro, have come to you with your wife, and her two sons with her. {18:7} Moshe went out to meet his ab-in-law, and bowed and kissed him. They asked each other of their welfare, and they came into the tent.

I find this portion of Scripture, which is taken from this weeks Torah reading, very comforting. In fact, I think that all married couples should as well. The reason I find it comforting is because it tells me that the marital problems that couples are experiencing today, including the marital problems that my wife and I have from time to time, are not something new. Couples have been having marriage problems since the institution of marriage. Adam and Chava (Eve) had their problems and now were getting a glimpse into Moshes rocky road relationship with his wife. I do not know about you, but I find it comforting to know that the great men and woman of the Bible were not superhuman, like some people make them out to be, but rather they were just plain frail, messed-up human beings just like the rest of us! In fact, in reading this passage from Scripture I can almost hear Moshe saying to me Welcome to my world Yaacov. Yes us, like most every other married couple that ever lived, have had marital problems. Now, our problems never deteriorated to the point of separation, but I am sure the thought crossed both of our minds at some time or other in our marriage. Were it not for Yeshua HaMashiach in our lives, who knows what might have happened.

I have counselled many couples in the years I have been a rabbi and I know how difficult it is for two people who originally came from different family backgrounds, grew up having different ideals, were taught different ways of thinking and were shown different ways of viewing problems to come together as one and find instant compatibility. Sure couples may boast of how alike they are and how well they get along during the courting period and even through the engagement period, but the fact remains that, as alike as they may think they are, they are not! They are, in fact, two very different and distinct people with two very different and distinct personalities.

Things change after the wedding. Living together as a married couple is not the same as courting or being engaged. It is easy to maintain a façade and a certain personal mystique when you are not living together as a married couple, but once a married couple is living in the same house together the masks come down and that is when marriage begins. I have found that most new couples, especially those who have not been counselled prior to their marriage, vie for supremacy in the relationship. Properly counselled couples should have dealt with that aspect of their relationship beforehand. Sadly not all couples that I have met were counselled and many, who were counselled, did not receive counsel on the biblical rolls of men and woman in a marriage. From the following narrative it appears that this was the case with Moshe and Zipporah:

Shemot {4:24} It happened on the way at a lodging place, that HaShem met him and wanted to kill him. {4:25} Then Zipporah took a flint, and cut off the foreskin of her son, and cast it at his feet; and she said, "Surely you are a bridegroom of blood to me." {4:26} So he let him alone. Then she said, "You are a bridegroom of blood," because of the Brit-Milah (Circumcision).

The way I interpret this portion of Scripture is that Moshe was trying to please his Gentile wife, who was obviously against circumcision, by not circumcising his son. This was obviously an affront to G-d. G-d took it so seriously that Scripture says that HaShem wanted to kill Moshe, maybe by striking him with some sort of illness. This was obviously an illness that could have led to death. When Zipporah learned or was told by Moshe that his affliction was from G-d and a direct result of his failure to circumcise their son, she grabbed a flint knife, performed the circumcision herself and in disgust threw the bloody foreskin at Moshes feet. We then hear nothing more of Zipporah until her father reunites her with her husband in this weeks Parasha. We do not know how long the couple were separated, but I venture to say that after that experience Zipporah was probably a kinder, gentler more submissive wife.

Let us not think that our marriages are going to be without conflicts, but rather let us put Yeshua HaMashiach at the centre of our marriages and ask Him to help us fulfill what was spoken of by the Shaliach Shaul (Apostle Paul) :

Kolosim (Colossians) {3:18} Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. {3:19} Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

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Baruch HaShem
Rabbi Ya'acov Farber